2020 was tough for many, and for me as well.
(Photo by Colton Sturgeon)
A couple of days ago, in December 31 at night, I finished the brief review of my 2020 and sent it to Ts, a friend I met on a hike back in 2017. Ts would then make it part of the yearly collection of reviews. There would be about 40 of them, all collected from his friends. This has been sort of tradition for a few years.
Soon afterwards Ts replied:
“What’s you keyword for this year?”
“Anxiety”, I replied without hesitation, which shocked me immediately.
I realized I had been anxious for the whole year. In January, the coronavirus outbreak continued to spread all around the globe. I saw all sorts of terrible things and tens of thousands suffering, which made me angry. Then the heroic whistleblower died in hospital.
In April, I accidentally read some blog posts on how to work in Germany with an EU Blue Card and how it is like to work in Germany. I admired the author for the work-life balance and decided to get a job in Germany too. After some efforts I finally managed to finish my resume and sent dozens of applications. While waiting for replies, I started interview preparation. I relearnt data structures and algorithms, and tried to practice speaking with shadowing technique. Howerver, to my disappointment, only one company replied and it was refusal.
Maybe my occupational experience wasn’t appealing enough to them. So I had to change my plan. I could work in a international company in China first. Or I could study abroad and then get a job with a post-study work permit, which would be much easier. Either way I should improve my English speaking proficiency and solve more LeetCode problems after work.
Days went away so fast. But I didn’t see much improvement in myself.
In September, I failed the Roblox interview in the first round. I messed up when solving a linked list problem.
In October, grandpa passed away. He was so gaunt so skinny. I stayed in my hometown for two weeks, doing absolutely nothing.
In November, I still couldn’t speak English well, and algorithms became my nightmare. I had my first IELTS test and the result of speaking was not good enough.
In December, I suspended my plan to study abroad due to objection from my parents. I would have to persuade them to accept my plan. And that won’t be an easy task.
So this was quite a year.
Now I have to rush to an end because I’m not satified or comfortable with my writing skills.
Singer: Leslie Cheung
猎户星座 - 朴树
Famous Blue Raincoat - Leonard Cohen
Everything Will Flow - Suede
Last Night On Earth - Green Day
TV series & Movies
None, because I had merely read two or three books, and I can’t remember any of them now.
My major sport was biking. I rided almost every workday as a way of commuting. Thanks to biking and moderate diet, I didn’t put on weight.
I went to Yangjiang with my family in July.